Friend Factor: WHAT caused the breakup?

First off, if the cause of the breakup is cheating, dishonesty or abuse, then your friends will feel more uncomfortable and take sides easily. Chances are they will side with the victim, unless they’re the type of loyal friends who will hide a body for you so you can get away with murder.

If a couple has a “peaceful” breakup, decided they weren’t right for each other, fought a lot, had different values and goals, then it’s easier for friends to remain friends with both Ex’s. Then friends will organically and peacefully be friends with both, choose the Ex they get along with best or stay with the Ex they were friends with before the relationship. If an ex’s friend was your friend when you entered the relationship and they choose to stay friends with your Ex, then you will feel betrayed. Just know that you’re better off without someone who chooses your Ex because they think it’s “greener pasture”. Be grateful they showed you their true colors as they were not the real friend you thought they were.

How about your “joint friendsters”? In that case, if you met these friends DURING your relationship then avoid trashing your Ex as this will make them feel uncomfortable. Save the bitching for your “old” friends! They know you better anyway and will provide you with the type of support you need.

In most “joint Friendster couples”, it’s organic that the woman will stay friends with the wife and the man with the husband. However, in some instances the wife will tend to ostracize the woman because she sees her as a “threat”, even if she never even showed signs of liking the hubby. Ladies, let’s get over this silly competitive fear and help our sisters in need!